Why this topic too often remains out of sight
Behavior from externals often goes under the radar, precisely because it does not come “from inside.” Employees feel ashamed. Or think they were not professional enough. Or that reporting it is pointless.
This creates silent suffering – and invisible exhaustion that comes at the expense of job satisfaction, motivation and loyalty.
And this is exactly where your role as a proactive confidential advisor lies:
You make visible what is not said. You legitimize the conversation. And you ensure that employees know:
“I am allowed to mention this too. I am not alone here either.”
What can you do?
Open the conversation – especially if it does not come naturally
Ask consciously about experiences with externals, customers or visitors.
Give recognition: “Behavior from outside can be just as boundary-crossing – and just as harmful.”
Normalize the conversation, not the behavior.
Encourage preventive frameworks and agreements
Think along about policy: What is the norm, and what happens if it is crossed?
Help teams or supervisors develop concrete scenarios:
What do you do if a client shows boundary-crossing behavior?
Who stands beside you then?
Make clear: protection does not stop at the front door.
Ensure visibility – without moralizing
Put the topic on the agenda through conversations, cases or information sessions.
Collaborate with HR, communication and supervisors: show that this is supported.
Emphasize the exemplary role of supervisors: support starts at the top.
Provide calm, recognition and language
Give space for doubt: “It did not feel okay, but maybe it was my fault…” is an entry point.
Help employees put into words what they felt.
Show gentleness: it is not always clear what a boundary is, but unsafety may always be named.
You make a difference here too
As a proactive confidential advisor, you do not look at who shows the behavior,
but at what it does to the employee.
Boundary-crossing behavior is boundary-crossing behavior, whether it comes from a colleague, a doctor, a customer or a patient.
Your role?
- Make it discussable.
- Normalize the conversation, not the behavior.
- Build a work culture in which it is clear:
“You do not have to swallow your boundaries – not even for customer satisfaction.”
This way you strengthen employees. And with that, the entire organization.
Judgement from your vision on proactive prevention
Systemic perspective
Make visible that social and psychological safety is not only about hierarchy or internal processes, but also about external influences and broader group dynamics. This aligns with your vision of the whole system, not just the incident.
Recognition and room for action
Not big interventions, but small, feasible steps that allow recognition and normalization. The space for doubt and hesitation is precisely seen as part of the process, just as you envision it.
Connection between policy and practice
The proactive confidential advisor is positioned as a bridge between practice and strategy, someone who has influence but does not sit in the policy seat. This reflects your vision of strategic partnership without power play.
Language use
The tone is empathetic, inviting and human-centered. No moral judgment or lecturing undertone, no jargon, but language that fits the rhythm of real conversations. Precisely the nuance you advocate.